


Spirals in Line

by orphan_account



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-13
Updated: 2013-11-13
Packaged: 2018-01-01 08:56:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1042918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jun’s cards come crashing down - but Aiba gives him four days and a chance. For the je-fqfest 2013.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spirals in Line

**Author's Note:**

  * For [silver_crystall](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=silver_crystall).



Once upon a time, maybe, Jun remembers clutching at Sho's face behind the rehearsal studios, looking for something in the dark he wasn't sure he was ready to find. Sweaty hands and sloppy kisses, too young for it all then "too old for this shit", and Jun remembers thinking he could almost hear the time passing through the crowd of voices that seemed to grow so quickly from one thousand to seventy. 

 

Sho would push him and pull him, test him and tease him; eleven minutes here and there in a hotel room or the alley behind a conbini, using harsh words with hidden meanings to control him until he was at such a point, everyone else was meaningless. He'd never thought of what was happening as cruel - it was Aiba who used that word, many, _many_ years later - and the end came as suddenly as the beginning. Leaving Jun at a loss, and his friendship with Sho in tatters, so he channelled himself into acting, performing and trying to live up to the Arashi name.

 

He and Sho got better. Over a decade, small steps. They became friends again, or something close to it, and the five of them were something like a whole. A tentative whole, in a lot of ways - mainly because of Jun's stubborn, mouth-zipped, nuh-uh resistance to talking about whatever it was that he and Sho _didn't_ have, when asked about it in the early days of the so-called Ice Age - but one that was respected and held together by the five of them in their own, different, fucked-up ways. It was hard, and there were days where Jun thought he was actually going to crack in two from the heartbreak of holding too many dangerous secrets, but one word from Nino, or a sideways look from Ohno; a drawn out after-work beer in a seedy bar with Aiba or pretending to be interested when Nishikido and Jin dragged him out by the hair to Roppongi - and, sure, he was okay. 

 

Nothing ever from Sho, of course, who seemed to be content at making the whole situation go away by working himself to death. It's typical and obvious, but Jun knows the only way Sho can ever be truly happy is if he works himself to death and pretends he's something he's not - "focus on the future, because the past is already lost." His mother tells him this, and Jun finally allows himself to relax, a little.

 

Until -

 

"Keiko and I - we're…getting married."

 

And just like that, it only takes one card to bring the castle down.

 

\---

 

It's Aiba who finds him. It's always Aiba who finds him, really, and Jun's lost count of the times he's woken up to find bright eyes and big teeth staring down at him. 

 

"Are you awake?" 

 

"No." He flips over and pushes his head under the sheets, hoping and praying that his bandmate is just an illusion brought on from the tequila chasers Shun was forcing down his throat hours before. Or maybe it was Shun's wife, or Toma, or maybe one of the kids from Kis-My-Ft2 or - _who the fuck knows_. "Get lost."

 

"Do you know where you are?" Poking now, through the sheets. "Jun, it's Masaki."

 

"For fuck's sakes." Jun sits up, the action almost making him throw up from the sheer volume of light now pounding into his brain. "Why are all the curtains open?!" Then - "Is that the Empire State Building?"

 

"You're in New York, Jun."

 

"Oh." Squinting his eyes, Jun finally looks up at Aiba and gets a concerned face in return. There's carry-on suitcase is next to him, and Jun notices through the waves of nausea how tired Aiba looks. "They sent you to get me?"

 

"More like I got a drunk call yesterday from Yamada Yu saying you were all hopping a plane here on Johnny's dime." Aiba takes off the bag he had slung over his shoulder, and sits on the bed. "Which was followed by one from Oh-chan, who got a call from Maruyama, who'd gotten a call from Ohkura, who'd gotten a call fro-" 

 

Jun put his hand up to stop him, knowing full well it may drag on all day thanks to the incestuousness that was their employer. "Why are you here?"

 

"You threw our schedules out. I volunteered." Aiba shrugs, tucking his foot under himself.

 

_You threw our schedules out._ "They're mad at me." 

 

"Of course they are. But they…understand. They're going to say you had a family emergency."

 

"In New York?" The laugh that rips out of him is raw, and sounds almost like a different person. It probably belonged to the same guy who thought it was a great idea to buy up all the first class tickets on a one-way trip to New York City with his so-called friends yesterday - and anger bubbles up inside him suddenly. Ugly, violent anger, and Jun finds himself punching wall behind the bed even before he knows he's doing it, before throwing up spectacularly beside Aiba's feet.

 

"Jun - _Jesus_." Carefully, Aiba stands, managing to avoid the pile of puke while keeping a neutral face. "He's getting married, not dying."

 

"Congratulations and happiness to all."

 

Aiba just shakes his head, and reaches for the phone. "I'll get housekeeping. And some coffee."

 

\---

 

Aiba tells him they have four days before they're both due back. Jun books a plane ticket online while Aiba paces behind him - "we have people to do that for us, you know." - but there's more control this way, and for once, Jun wants to work his way back from insanity by being the one in charge. Because that's what this was; four days for him to work out what to do with the feelings that seemed to have changed from a crush into misplaced anger towards someone he knew didn't deserve it. Not really, and Jun clicks "buy now" on the JAL website and breathes out the breath he didn't know he was holding when the email confirmation pops up in his inbox.

 

It was a blessing, this small bit of control. Like Arashi was a curse, and he stands up and smiles at Aiba. "What are we going to do today?"

 

Aiba freezes. "I'm booked to go home at -"

 

"Cancelled."

 

"What? Huh - _how_?" 

 

Jun smiles, trying to ignore the throbbing hangover that made itself known as he bent forward to grab his jacket. "I rang those people who we apparently only have around to buy us plane tickets. I said I needed you for moral support."

 

A strange expression crosses Aiba's face - briefly, like a stretch of pain or confusion, and Jun tilts his head to the side. "Are you okay? Is this okay, I mean, you can go home but I thought maybe…" He trails off, and stuffs his hands in his pockets. 

 

Suddenly there's a smile as bright as the day outside spreading across Aiba's face, and Jun wonders if the look he'd seen seconds before was just a sign of his still-drunkedness. "Sure. I'm your Aiba-shaped moral support." He picks up his jacket, and walks to the door, the air in the room suddenly heavy with something Jun can't find the energy to be briefly confused about. 

 

\---

 

"Strippers," is all Jun responds with when Aiba asks him what he wants to do, so Aiba calls Jin and gets the name of some high-class establishment that would cater to them at 3:30 in the afternoon. It's clean, not that busy; they're given a VIP booth because Jin's called ahead and as they're lead to the back, Jun wonders briefly if Meisa had changed Jin all that much. Would Keiko change Sho all that much, really; and Jun knows the answer to that, so he accepts the bottle of champagne and pair of girls offered to him at the same time.

 

Tits in his face and the booze seems to dull his hangover - so does the next bottle and the next set of girls, and it's only on bottle three/girl five that he notices Aiba staring into space. "These girls not good enough for you, Masaki?" and Jun knows the ugly side of his drinking is this try-hard, swagging personality he's probably stolen from Nishikido, but he couldn't stop it if he tried. Fuck, he didn't even _want_ to stop it, so he kisses the girl currently on his lap and shoves a US ten dollar bill down her g-string. "What is your name?" he asks her, in accented English, and she smiles like a shark showing its teeth.

 

"You don't care, do you?" The English is lost on him, so Jun shrugs and nudges Aiba. "Come on, have some fun!"

 

"I'm having fun watching you have fun."

 

"Is this because of Becky?"

 

Aiba frowns. "Becky?"

 

"You're getting that, right? Nino told me."

 

"Well - yeah. No," and he sits forward, resting his head in his hands. "Jun, I think we need to talk."

 

The stripper ground down into Jun's lap, and he laughed. "Why? What about?"

 

"Sho and Keiko."

 

"What about them? Happy couple, congratulations!" The last word spills out in English, and the stripper cheers, toasting her own glass against Jun's entire bottle and they scull. "Everyone's happy, see?"

 

Aiba reaches forward, and touches the stripper on the shoulder, gesturing for her to leave. A bitchy shrug and she throws some words at them they don't quite understand - they get the "you still have to pay", anyway - and Aiba follows her out, closing the door behind him. Leaving Jun alone, so he shrugs and falls back into the couch and rubs his dick. _Still couldn't get it up for her, even if she was on your lap, right?_

 

The door opens twenty minutes later and Aiba comes back in. Jun doesn't look at him until he's sitting back beside him, offering a cup of coffee. "Here."

 

"The coffee sobering up thing is a myth." But he takes it anyway, because he's suddenly realising that maybe he wasn't as drunk as he thought he was. 

 

"You know I'm gay, right."

 

It comes out of nowhere, and Jun almost spills his coffee in shock, putting it down before he does. "Wha- _Becky_?"

 

Aiba shrugs, and crosses his legs. "We tried. But she realised before I did. Well, I guess I've always known, but you can't exactly be honest with yourself when your whole career is based on keeping up an image that the company has created for you."

 

"Oh." It's all Jun can think of saying, because his stomach begins to churn and his heart is beating faster than he thought possible. Aiba wasn't ever seen as "smart" - not like him, or Sho, or even Nino or Ohno - but he'd always been honest, especially with Jun, and for a moment, he actually feels angry. 

 

"You're probably angry," and this makes Jun look at him in surprise, like he'd read his mind - and he stares at the bandmate he'd known for almost two decades but was only now being trusted with something so intrinsic and important to Aiba's very being that it made him wonder exactly why he was telling him now. "And I understand that. None of the others know, maybe except Nino, but - " he laughs - "Nino knows everything before everyone else, so."

 

"Why are you telling me now?"

 

"It seems the right time." He laughs, and waves his hand around. "In a strip club, thousands of kilometres from home."

 

"Masaki."

 

"We all knew about you and Sho. Whatever it was. And we tried to pretend it didn't worry us, but it did. I can't make excuses for Sho, because he was cruel to you. Not because he's a cruel person, but because you were screwing with his perfect idea of himself, and he knew he had to stop it before you both ruined us all. He didn't know how to deal with it, so he was cruel. It's not an excuse, but it's the way he is. And -" Aiba stops, breathes out, and seems to gather up the gusto to continue. "The three of us - Nino, Ohno, me - we were stupid not to say anything to you both, but we didn't want to ruin Arashi before it had the chance to, y'know. _Be_ Arashi."

 

"So you let me be fucked with for the sake of your career," Jun laughs, roughly, and leans forward to grab the champagne bottle again before taking a swig. "Nice."

 

Aiba shakes his head, his eyes firmly directed to the ground. "It's not that easy. Sho's not that easy, you know that. It's why I could never come out, not really. Because I know you'd probably all end up hating me for it, because that would ruin the band, too."

 

The ugly reality of how selfish Jun realises he's been slaps him in the face. Over ten years he'd been wasting, dwelling on an idea of something that he wasn't even sure was real to begin with, while Aiba had been quietly keeping the most important parts of himself back for all of their sakes. He feels even more sick than before, and he's not sure if it's the alcohol or the quiet honesty that's just crawled into the back of his brain in a strip club in New York City. 

 

The music from the club's main room reaches them, an ugly grinding beat that's punctuated with an MC lazily calling out the name "Crystal", and Jun has to ask. "Do you think he's happy with her?"

 

"Yes. Very. She makes him laugh, and you know we don't see that much anymore."

 

"She's lovely."

 

"You like her?" The surprise is noticeable in Aiba's voice, and Jun half-smiles.

 

"Yeah, I do. They're good fit."

 

"I think so, too." Aiba leans forward, and pulls the champagne out of Jun's hand and puts the coffee cup back. The warmth of their hands outweighs that of the Starbucks, and Jun closes his eyes tightly.

 

"Do you think you deserve to be happy?" The silence, punctuated by the dull beat of the bad techno song playing out in the strip club, says everything. "Masaki. Look at me."

 

There's a long moment, where Jun almost thinks he has to reach across and make Aiba forcibly look him in the eyes, but slowly, eventually, he does. Kind eyes, ones Jun was so familiar with, but there's suddenly a noticeable tiredness and age that Jun thinks makes Aiba look sad. Worn, even, and Aiba goes to say something, but he stops.

 

"Let's get out of here," and Jun smiles until Aiba tentatively smiles back. 

 

\---

 

They don't speak much until the next day, when Jun decides they're going to the zoo in Central Park. He suddenly wants to make this trip as much as about him as Aiba, because there's something new and shifted in their relationship that Jun's not quite sure how to articulate - so he decides the best place to get a smile back on Aiba's face is the one filled with animals. Aiba's using broken English on everyone, culminating in a hilarious jump back from the reptile exhibit when a zoo keeper attempts to wrap a giant boa constrictor around his shoulders. "SNAKE NO, I DON'T LIKE SNAKE," and Jun finds himself laughing so hard, he's actually crying.

 

Of course, like every cliched emotional scene, the tears become heaving sobs, and he's almost on the ground in the darkest corner of the reptile room when he feels Aiba's arms around him. "Jun, shhh. It's okay. Let's go."

 

Jun's not sure how they manage to get out onto the busy New York street, but it's almost like Aiba's teleported them there. Or maybe it's because Jun realises that he feels nothing but safe when Aiba's got his arms around him - like he's the only person in the whole world who seems to be working towards making sure that Jun is actually, truly okay, even though he's struggling with his own, massive problems. He says nothing, though, and lets Aiba just direct him through the throngs of people as they manage to make themselves disappear.

 

Faceless, for once, and Jun slips his hand into Aiba's and squeezes. "Thank you."

 

Aiba doesn't respond, except for clenching their hands closer together. 

 

\---

 

They talk about Sho, over dinner, breakfast, shopping at Macy's. They talk about Keiko, about how she's made Sho a better person - no, a happier person - and how they're all grateful for that. They talk about Jun, how he seemed to be angry at something that no longer existed, about two kids who grew into two images that seemed to blur into the people they really were. Jun begins to forgive, and at dinner on the third night, Aiba begins to talk, the pressure radiating from him as he picks at his food.

 

"This is hard," and two tears slip down Aiba's cheeks as he tries to laugh it off. Jun's up off his seat quickly, running his thumb across Aiba's cheeks to wipe them clean - he's not sure why he does that, but it's almost like he's begun to see the beautiful person he always knew Aiba was, but never took the time to really see. Because it's hard when you're one-of-five, always together and bound together by fame and kept apart by too many hidden emotions and things that should have been dealt with, but weren't; and Jun hates himself for letting the past dilute the relationship he should have had with Aiba from the beginning. One of honesty and truth, and he's thankful for these four days and Sho's bombshell because it's letting him get this time with Aiba he knew he wouldn't have had normally. 

 

His jacket drags through the sauce on the steak he's not really enjoying as he pulls back, and it's worth the mess when Aiba begins to laugh, genuinely. There's something miraculous that happens to Aiba when he smiles - like a thousand lights are turned on to illuminate the darkest street you can imagine. His eyes crinkle and the sound is like magic; genuine and honest - and amazingly, Jun decides he wants to kiss him. Violently, forever; and he only notices Aiba's stopped laughing and he's probably been staring for a long time when Aiba's confused "Jun?" reaches him through the haze of his thoughts.

 

"I want to kiss you," and he does, sending cutlery flying along with any common sense.

 

\---

 

They make it to the restaurant's cloak room before Jun can't take it and pulls Aiba in by the shirt. There's no-one around - it's past twelve and the cloakroom shut at 11pm, and he's pushing his lips against Aiba's in a frenzy of want as he pulls the door shut and locked behind them. Aiba's muttering - "Jun, Jun - we can't -" and then he's pushing his tongue into Jun's mouth, his hands snaking up the sides of Jun's t-shirt and the groans coming from his throat are making Jun so hard, he can hardly stand it.

 

Then - "I can't do this." Aiba breaks away, panting, leaning against the back wall and clattering coathangers with his head. 

 

"Why?"

 

The look Aiba gives him scares him. Because it's more honesty than he's seen in years, and Jun finally understands why Aiba flew so far to save him.

 

"You know why."

 

The room feels massive, but Jun makes short work of it, grabbing Aiba's face between his hands and kissing him with everything he had. With his whole heart, his soul and all that other soppy bullshit, because if anyone deserved to know they were worth love, it was Aiba Masaki. And he's crying, because he loves Aiba so much as a friend, that it seems almost perfectly organic that the love would turn into the other kind. The forever kind, and he doesn't stop kissing him until Aiba's gripping at his hair and neck with a ferocity that makes Jun know that whatever went down, it was going to be worth it.

 

Falling sideways, banging into the coathangers and sending some flying, causing them both to laugh - and Aiba gets serious as he looks Jun straight in the eyes. "I want you."

 

"I want you, too," and Jun's surprised when Aiba bites his lip and - very unceremoniously - sticks his hand down Jun's pants. It's a tight fit - what with his raging boner - so Jun facilitates by unbuckling his belt and unzipping his pants, refusing to break eye contact as Aiba grips him and begins to stroke. Slowly, lightly brushing his finger along the tip and causing Jun to flinch in pleasure before - surprisingly, amazingly, alarmingly - Aiba drops to his knees and takes Jun into his mouth.

 

"Masaki - oh - this -" and anything Jun wants to say about this being too fast is swallowed almost literally by Aiba's warm mouth and tongue around his cock and his hands cupping his balls, the sensation breaking his resolve as his hands move to the back of Aiba's head in a silent form of need. Fingers tangling in his hair, and Jun looks down, his breath taken by the picture of Aiba pulling his mouth along his dick while making noises Jun can only read as blatant, dirty want. 

 

"Touch yourself," Jun breathes, and Aiba's hands drop from Jun's balls as he looks up at him almost coyly. It's enough to bring Jun right to the edge, but he holds it, shuddering as Aiba pulls Jun out of his mouth - not without a nip of teeth, and Jun grips the back of Aiba's hair roughly in response - and Aiba's made quick work of his own pants. He begins stroking himself before resuming exactly where he left off, and Jun almost can't decide what's making him more worked up - Aiba obviously getting off on giving Jun possibly the best blow-job of his life or the blow-job itself. Probably the former, because it's the sight of Aiba pumping his hand up and down that causes Jun to push at the back of Aiba's head as a sign to go faster.

 

There's probably a moment Jun should pull himself together, just a little, and realise he's currently fucking the face of a man he's stood beside for the better part of two decades, but it's lost as Aiba's tongue brushes over Jun's tip, his throat somehow taking in the whole of Jun. It's white noise, and Jun doesn't know how he went this long without this in his life. "I'm gonna - Masaki -" 

 

He expects Aiba to pull Jun's dick out of his mouth, but he doesn't - instead, he gives Jun a look of intensity as bobs up and down faster, his hand working at the same speed on his own dick, and Jun almost feels like he's going to break in half when he finally comes into Aiba's mouth. His knees buckle a little, and Aiba pulls his dick out of his mouth and swallows, grinning. It's filthy, and Jun's chest is heavy and his brain a mess, but he's coherent enough to flick his pleasure-hazy eyes down to watch Aiba bring himself over the edge, his cum spilling on the floor.

 

It's _absolutely_ filthy, and messy, and amazing; Jun falls to his knees and kisses Aiba hungrily, tasting himself and sweat and it's enough to make him hard again. 

 

"The hotel."

 

It's all that Aiba need to say, and after using some napkins to clean up their mess, they sneak out of the cloakroom giggling like schoolgirls.

 

\---

 

They stop for condoms and lube, and Aiba's half-assed English at the Seven-Eleven seems funnier than it honestly should be. Jun knows he's punch-drunk on _whatever_ this is, and he takes Aiba's hand when it's offered, swinging the plastic bag and not caring if one of their substantial number of international fans was taking a grainy iPhone photo of them at that very moment.

 

The room is cold, the city lit up below them, and Jun orders some beer and burgers before pushing Aiba against a wall and running his nose along his cheeks, neck, collarbones - denying them both the connection of lips to flesh, because they both seem to know the other likes it a little less-than-fair and that's a-okay.

 

It surprises Jun a little, this aggressive, nasty side of Aiba; he'd joked over beers with the Jin Crew that the little he knew about his bandmate's sexual habits the better - but if he'd known that Aiba was the type to drive him to the brink of blacking out from orgasm in a dark cloakroom in a foreign country, well. It certainly would have made the long Shinkansen rides a little more interesting, especially with how Aiba was now managing to break him down right now by basically blowing in his ear. Push and pull, and they spend the twenty minutes before the room service arrives pressed against the white wall and touching each other only with pressure and breath. 

 

"We should eat," because Jun's responsible like that, and they quickly eat their burgers while looking everywhere else in the room but at each other. Probably because it would end in a burger massacre and a very weird cleaning bill if their eyes did meet, and Jun gulps down the beer before standing and pacing the room. He's antsy, suddenly, and his brain begins to work too quickly.

 

"You're overthinking," Aiba says, around a mouth of burger. "You're always overthinking."

 

"It's what got us to New York in the first place, right?" He's running his hands through his hair, and he's surrounded by too many thoughts. About Sho, about his sexuality, about Arashi and Nino and Ohno and the fans and Johnny - then Aiba's there, his hands on either side of his face, his kind eyes looking into Jun's and it all just seems to go away. Silence, beautiful, honest silence; and a thought hits Jun like a spark in the dark.

 

"Is this what love feels like?" And it's out before he can stop it, Aiba's face lighting up and a laugh pulling from him that sounds like relief and happiness in one fell swoop. Jun kisses him, not because he wants to make him stop, because it's the one way he knows he can make Aiba keep laughing that way forever.

 

They make it to the bed, kissing, touching, playing with each other's hair, and Jun forgets about Japan. He feels Aiba's skin under his fingertips, tanned kind of from filming _Shimura Zoo_ at Ueno Park last week; he tastes the sting of the onions Aiba'd had with his burger; presses his forehead to Aiba's and just watches him. Clutches his wrist with his hand when Aiba brings it up to his face, and Jun doesn't feel confused anymore - just relieved.

 

"I want you to fuck me, Jun." 

 

It's not something Jun ever expected to hear from Aiba Masaki's mouth, but it's probably the thing he'd didn't know he'd been waiting forever to hear.

 

\---

 

Slowly, Jun stands up and begins to strip. He doesn't know why he does it, but it's almost like he wants to present himself to Aiba in the most intimate way he can - pulling his shirt over his head, throwing it to the floor, and Aiba slides back onto the bed, his head resting on his hand, watching like Jun like he was one of those animals he always seemed to find so damn intriguing. It wasn't like when he play-stripped for the fans, the opening of one of his solos pounding away around him; there's just silence, and he starts to undo his belt buckle. Painfully, and he smirks when Aiba swallows heavily and the bulge in his pants becomes noticeable.

 

Pants off now, puddled on the ground before Jun kicks them aside, and he turns around playfully, slipping down his underwear so Aiba gets a quick view of his ass before pulling them back up again. Jun throws a look over his shoulder and grins - "more? Less?" 

 

"More," Aiba says, sitting up, unbuttoning his own shirt while Jun teased with his ass a little more, eventually pulling his underwear down and aside. He turns back to Aiba, whose shirt is off the side of the bed, cupping his cock in his hands as he begins to walk slowly towards the bed. He's smirking, and Aiba's smiling, and it's nothing like any other time he's slept with anyone and Jun's torn between making it last all night or giving in to his need - because by now, Aiba's managed to work some magic because he's fully naked, stroking his dick as Jun approaches and Jun will be damned if it's not the hottest thing he's ever seen.

 

Aiba opens his legs, and Jun crawls on top of him, splaying his hands across Aiba's chest and kissing him hard. Long, with tongue and teeth, moving down to Aiba's neck and shoulders, trailing down to his nipples before giving them both a nip and making Aiba groan, almost growl. He gets aggressive now, pulling Jun back up and down to his lips, grinding his hips up against Jun's, gripping his hand around Jun's dick as he mutters, "do it."

 

There's a moment of confusion as they grab the condoms and lube, Jun rolling it on with practiced ease and Aiba using his fingers to run the lube over his ass. Confusion, because it's too fast and too slow, and Jun almost calls the whole thing off until he looks at Aiba and sees something he's not prepared for. He sees a hundred things that scare him - he sees Aiba, mostly, his heart and his soul and a hundred other cliched things better off left in the pages of a romance novel or a terrible TV drama. But mostly he sees _forever_ ; serendipity and just - _Aiba_ , his friend and his companion who likes stealing his ramen and letting him cry with frustration over a beer; who's good with animals and kids despite being pretty afraid of both; short pants and wrinkled eyes, and it's enough to spur Jun into action.

 

"Are you sure?" and Jun chokes it out as Aiba opens his legs wider and smiles - lazily, with lust and love, and Jun grips his knees, steadies himself against Aiba’s ass and pushes his dick inside. 

 

He's tight, and hot, and it takes a moment for them both to adjust. Aiba lets out a sound of pain and Jun stops, but Aiba begins pushing against Jun as a sign to keep going, meeting each of Jun's tentative thrusts with one of double intensity. Sweat breaks out on his forehead, his chest; he's biting his lips and closing his eyes and Jun can't look away. The moment seems unreal, like a decadent fantasy Jun had never entertained, and Aiba's hands fumble towards his own erection, using one hand to lazily masturbate himself and the other to grip at Jun to bring him closer.

 

It's like nothing Jun's ever felt before. Maybe because it's not like being with a girl, and maybe because it's Aiba - and part of him, most of him, wants to be a gentleman by going slow. Moving in and out, slowly, lazily; it feels so good that Jun wants it to last, and he wants to make sure that Aiba enjoys it as much as he is. 

 

Eventually he starts to give in to his own urges a little and begins to pound faster, his balls slapping against Aiba's ass the only sound in the empty room accompanying their grunts. They're grunts of exertion and pleasure, and Aiba's fingers find Jun's nipple and he tweaks, pulling something up from somewhere that washes over Jun like a wave. He starts to think of the next time this happens - in his apartment, in Tokyo, taking Aiba from behind as they both watch themselves fucking the mirror and he bites his lip and grips Aiba’s hips as he tries hard to concentrate on the scene _actually_ playing out in front of him. Getting ahead of himself, like always, and he smiles at the look of supreme ecstasy playing across Aiba’s face as he licks his lips like a cat getting the cream he’d been waiting a long, long time for. 

 

It's like Aiba and he were already in sync, the perfect friction building and Aiba's fingers are wet with pre-cum and lube as he begins to pump at his dick quicker. It's a sign for Jun to go harder and he does, the same time Aiba groans out a guttural " _fuck_ " that sounds foreign and pornographic to Jun coming from his lips.

 

Grabbing Aiba's leg, Jun throws it over his shoulder to get deeper inside and Aiba's response is a groan and a "faster, come on," that spurs Jun to meet the speed Aiba's using on his own dick. It’s intense, hot; and without warning Aiba clenches his ass around Jun’s cock and Jun almost sees stars. 

 

“Do you like that, huh,” and Aiba’s smirking in a way Jun’s never seen in the entire time he’s known him. It’s a challenge, really, and Jun rises to it by gripping Aiba’s skin so he leaves crescent-moon marks of silent ownership before pushing in rough. He obviously hits Aiba’s prostate - the sound that strips from Aiba’s lips is almost inhumanly sexy, his skin flushing and his hand easing on his own cock for a moment before he quickly returns to pumping it with the same intensity Jun’s using on his ass. 

 

Jun's dripping sweat all over Aiba's stomach and hands and he can feel the pressure building inside him like an oven. He can sense Aiba's close, his eyes clamped shut and his breath coming fast, and Jun gives a few more thrusts in the raw way he seems to like before Aiba lets out a cry of pleasure and comes all over his own stomach. It's enough - fuck, it's enough - and Jun keeps thrusting as his orgasm brings his need to a head and he collapses against Aiba, still inside him.

 

He feels weak and at a loss; the both of them panting against the other, sweat mingling, and almost painfully, Jun pulls out of Aiba. There's a moment of uncomfort that crosses Aiba's face, but it settles back into one of red-faced, easy pleasure that makes Jun break into a grin he tries - unsuccessfully - to hide. Pulling the condom off and throwing it in the trash, he turns back to Aiba and scrambles into his arms.

 

They're quiet for a long time. A really long time, and Jun wonders if maybe something is wrong, because he can tell by Aiba's breathing that he's not asleep. 

 

"You okay?" Jun barely hears himself say it, but Aiba nods. 

 

"I'm excellent. Are you okay?"

 

There's a double meaning to the words, one that Jun understands completely, and knows why they're being kind-of asked. "Yes. I'm. Finally okay."

 

He feels Aiba smile, and cuddles closer into him. The sun was coming up, the sun backlighting the Empire State Building, and he's surprised, flicking his eyes over at the clock to see it's almost six AM. They were due on a flight in less than six hours - one back to Japan, back to Johnny's and back to all the problems Jun had left behind, but it all seemed moot given what the past four days had blessed him with. The ability to close down his anger directed towards Sho, and also against Johnny's, in a way - and with that, he found something he'd never expected, but knew was actually probably inevitable. A gift wrapped up as four days and an impossible, Aiba-shaped package, and Jun feels content. A weird feeling for him, but he decides to embrace it.

 

"We can't miss our flight," Aiba mutters against his hair.

 

"True, we need to join the Mile High Club."

 

The laugh that comes from Aiba's throat is the best answer he could have ever wanted, and Jun smiles. 

 

\---


End file.
